Being happy. We wish it for ourselves, our families, our kids, friends, and sometimes strangers we’ve never met.
It’s one of the most sought after goals. One we have for life. It’s not like once you’ve accomplished it you can cross it off your to-do list. It’s something you search for over and over again.
Sometimes it comes easily and sometimes it seems that it will never come your way again.
There are times in life when happiness seems such a long way away.
Everything just seems to go wrong, and problems and set-backs seem to snowball.
Life isn’t all rainbows and fun. But sometimes a change in mindset can make a huge difference.
So how can you find your happy?
Accept that everything isn’t perfect
It can be exhausting on the quest for perfection, especially when often, perfection doesn’t really exist. Try and focus more on the positive, less on the negative and move away from the idea of perfection.
Do your best
Be realistic. It can be easy to have a long list of goals, but the mistake a lot of people make is making them impossible or unattainable. Start off small, do those and then move the goal posts. You’ll feel better when you accomplish something, and more likely to be eager to move on. One step at a time.
Don’t compare yourself
When you constantly compare yourself to others, it can make you feel like you’ll never measure up or you just can’t do anything as well as someone else. You don’t know what their life is like. Often we only see a snapshot or what they want us to see. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking everyone else’s life is perfect. But more than often, it’s not. Tap into your own confidence. What can you do better than anyone else? Chances are someone has wished they could do something as well as you.
Wake up in the morning and think about the things you are grateful for. Concentrate on what you have, not what you don’t have. Make it a daily habit. It will become easier to focus on the positives in your life.
Believe in yourself
If you believe you can do something, you are more likely to make it happen. When negativity creeps in, it’s easy to put things on the backburner or in the too hard basket, and give up. Believe it, and make it happen.
Ignore your negative inner voice
If all you hear are your negative self thoughts, you will begin to believe them, and your self confidence will take a battering. It can be hard to ignore at times, but when you start to consciously think about the negative things you are thinking, you are giving them less power and more room for positivity. Kick those negative thoughts away.
Let go of mistakes
It can be easy to have past mistakes take up residence in the present. Deal with them, learn from them and leave them back where they belong – in the past. If you keep reminding yourself of these mistakes you are allowing them to take some of your happiness each day.
Set yourself challenges. What do you want from life? What do you need to do to get it? What is standing in your way? Do what you need to do to get to where you want to be. Make a plan and set it in motion. Put a note or photo of what you want where you will see it daily so you are constantly reminded of what you want. It will help keep you motivated.
If you keep making excuses, you’ll never get anywhere. You can put things off for eternity. Another day, another day. Then it will forever be, another day. Do what you can, even if it’s only a bit at a time. Otherwise, years may pass and you will be no closer to it than where you are right now.
Do some exercise, take up a class or pop in a DVD and do it at home. Go with a friend if it helps. Find something you enjoy. Even going for a walk in the fresh air and sunshine can make a huge difference.
You definitely need to have time to yourself from time to time to recharge your batteries and feel like you can breathe again. Do something (or nothing at all if that’s what you want) for yourself that you enjoy, even if it’s only for a short time if that’s all you can get.
Accept and love who you are
It’s no good going through life wishing you were someone else or wish you had their life. As Dr Seuss says, “ There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” Believe in yourself and love your own uniqueness. Understand your own failings and forgive yourself for them.
Everyone wants to be happy, but it isn’t always the easiest to find – and keep.
Keep at it and it will become easier.
How do you find your happy?